2012 – typical Roland Emmerich disaster cheese featuring rich people forced to befriend poor people, improbably perfect U.S. Presidents, improbably evil Presidential aides, over the top conspiracy nuts and a waterlogged third act. Though it’s got John Cucack, so that’s cool. |
C |
Adventureland – effective romance with Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart. The big game-changing moment takes forever to arrive, but director Greg Mottola makes up for that with heart and a knack for realistically capturing the vibe of an Eighties that didn’t exist in a cultural vacuum. |
B+ |
Amelia – overly slagged biopic that comes across as safe – but so what? The love story between Hillary Swank and Richard Gere worked, which ultimately made the film worth watching.
If Earhart had been depicted as a crack-crazed murderess it probably would have gotten higher marks from the rest of the world. |
B- |
Angels & Demons – silly Dan Brown adaptation that’s nonetheless far more entertaining than The DaVinci Code.
The key to cracking this one is thus: if you suspect a character of being evil, they’re good. If they come across as good peeps, they’re up to something. |
C- |
Antichrist – this impossible-to-rate Lars Von Trier genital mutilation fest is psychologically interesting and occasionally beautiful to behold.
Be wary of kneejerk accusations of misogyny, as there’s more going on here than just sexist hatred and eyeball excoriation. I think. |
B |
Anvil! The Story of Anvil – a perfect documentary that captures the Spinal Tap-esque reality of Canada’s unsung thrash metal heroes. Funny, sad and inspirational – it’s an amazing watch regardless of your thoughts on heavy metal music. |
A |
Avatar – James Cameron finally came back to narrative film, and seems to have captured the zeitgeist yet again.
The story of a crippled space marine “going native” on a mineral-rich planet of spindly blue tree huggers is relatively thin and surprisingly heavy-handed, but the 3-D and CG effects are sublime.
I mostly appreciated the film’s affinity for 70s science fiction art (a la Roger Dean) and its overall feel of a vintage Larry Niven or Joe Haldeman novel come to life. |
B+ |
Away We Go – I so wanted to hate this film, featuring too-quirky-for-you characters portrayed by Maya Rudolph and John Krasinski.
But once these expectant slacker parents began their zany self-evaluating road trip and endured Maggie Gyllenhaal’s overt nuttiness, I was sold. |
B+ |
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans – Werner Herzog sorta remaking the classic Harvey Keitel/Abel Ferrara bleak-athon with Nic Cage?! Sounded crazy to me, too.
But wouldn’t you know it, this absurdly hilarious tale of a misanthropic cop navigating and savoring the New Orleans underworld was an odd hoot. Imaginary lizards and breakdancing spirits just made it that much cooler. |
A- |
Bruno – Sacha Baron Cohen copied the template from Borat, but lost the laughs somewhere along the line. The situations sound funny on paper and in conversation, but they fall deadly flat on the big screen. |
D |
Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant – another wrongly maligned teen-lit adaptation, featuring a hip soundtrack and the odd casting of John C. Reilly as a “cool” vampire.
It’s not killer material, but it’s got some style and is reminiscent of fun 80s Chris Columbus flicks. |
B- |
Confessions of a Shopaholic – Isla Fisher is charming as hell, but her skills couldn’t save the tired plotting of this sad situational comedy.
The gags are forced and unbelievable, and after a while it becomes hard to sympathize with a character who does the dumbest things just to drive the plot. |
C- |
Coraline – Neil Gaiman’s story might be overly similar to Clive Barker’s The Thief Of Always, but Henry Selick’s stop-motion animation adaptation is top notch fantasy.
Great voice casting, amazing 3-D and a gorgeous color palette are icing on the cake that is plain old great, involving writing. |
A |
Couples Retreat – Four couples – some on the outs, some happily married – are fooled into “vacationing” at an intensive relationship counseling seminar. Hijinks ensue.
It’s not quite as bad as one would believe, and Vince Vaughn and Malin Akerman’s characters help with their down to earth attitudes and sincerity. |
C+ |
Dance Flick – the Wayans family finally get back to the type of absurd silliness that make I’m Gonna Get You Sucka so much fun. Worth watching once for the hilarious set dressings alone. |
B- |
Defiance – Ed Zwick finally dropped a historical epic that wasn’t ingratiating. The true story (parts of which are debated) of Jewish refugees hiding in the Eastern European woodlands was buoyed by engaging performances from Daniel Craig, Liev Schreiber and Jamie Bell. |
B+ |
District 9 – Neill Blomkamp’s alien Apartheid allegory is nothing less than great science-fiction. The evolution of a whiny, ineffective bureaucrat into a foul-mouthed, selfless rebel was one of the most involving character arcs in recent cinema history. |
A |
Drag Me To Hell – Sam Raimi’s return to horror form managed to balance his tendency toward Three Stooges slapstick with genuine fear. Extra points go for staging most of the scariest moments during daylight scenes and still being able to get under our skin. |
A- |
Duplicity – Clive Owen and Julia Roberts share some genuine chemistry in this tale of corporate espionage, although some of the extended flashback sequences drag on and underline what we already understood. |
B- |
Earth – recycled footage from the Planet Earth television series. While still fascinating and beautiful, in more cases than not worn prints on the big stained screen failed to match the jaw-dropping impact the same stuff had on home HD displays. |
C |
Fast And Furious – for once Vin Diesel is both fast and furious as promised by the title. Out for revenge over a loved one’s early demise, this bridge between films two and three in the franchise has some occasional moments of fun.
Sadly, the heavily computer generated tunnel chase in the third act fails to deliver any sustained thrills. |
C |
Friday The 13th - the inevitable remake of the “classic” slasher film gets by on self-aware wise cracks and a sincere desire to deliver simple shocks and ample cheese. |
C |
Funny People – Judd Apatow’s first stinker! While the core story between Adam Sandler and Seth Rogen shows promise, the eventual love triangle that develops is forced, tiring and ultimately pointless.
When the story finally jacks back into the relationship of these two stand-up comedians (one up-and-coming, one established and possibly dying), you just want to scream at the screen “It’s about frickin’ time!” |
C- |
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra – more fun than an adaptation of 80s toys has any right to be, and far more satisfying than the second Transformers dud.
See it alone for Dennis Quaid’s overt ham, Channing Tatum’s inability to enunciate and the bizarre inclusion of Christopher Eccleston and Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Cobra baddies. |
C |
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past – another Matthew McConaughey trifle, but a fun enough romantic spin on A Christmas Carol. Extra points go to Michael Douglas’ zany Robert Evans rip-off. |
B- |
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince – the most character-driven outing in the series sees the kids at Hogwarts largely tortured by hormones.
Everybody complains about the brevity of the finale, but I didn’t find it to give the emotions short shrift. Perhaps too light on the magic, but definitely a compelling prelude to the big finale. |
A- |
I Love You, Man – while Apatow misfired with Funny People, his stable of talent continue to shine. Jason Segel and Paul Rudd deliver the goods in this painfully hilarious tale of a budding bromance.
Slappa da bass, toats magoats and Jobin will all be permanently added to your conversation vocabulary after seeing it. |
A |
Ice Age 3: Dawn of the Dinosaurs – forgettable yet fun sequel that could have easily been ported directly to video. Simon Pegg’s one-eyed weasel Buck will maintain interest, but don’t expect much of it to resonate after the credits roll. |
C+ |
Knowing – Alex Proyas injects some interesting concepts (at a late hour) into this apocalyptic mystery featuring Nic Cage as an alcoholic widower.
Intrigue abounds, but if you later thing back upon the goals and needs of those pulling the strings of the plot, it becomes clear that just about none of it makes a lick of logical sense. |
C- |
Law Abiding Citizen – a silly dramatic actioner about Gerard Butler’s vendetta against the justice system after it fails him grievously.
Come to find out he’s not your average joe, but an amalgam of James Bond, Jason Bourne and John McClane. And he’s pissed off enough to make stuff (and people’s heads) asplode. |
C+ |
Monsters vs. Aliens – while a little light on the titular war, the feminist tale of the gargantuan Susan and fun characters like B.O.B. and Insectosaurus.
Less successful are its numerous attempts at bridging the humor gap between children and adults, as much of the Dr. Strangelove-esque hijinks involving the government fail to elicit guffaws. |
B |
My Life In Ruins – Nia Vardalos failed to recapture her Greek Wedding box office magic, but this lighthearted road trip love story was surprisingly charming. Plus, I'm a sucker for poopy jokes. |
B |
Night At The Museum: Battle Of The Smithsonian – bigger and better isn’t usually a good sign for a sequel, but the addition of Hank Azaria and Amy Adams to the rest of the returning cast enlivened this romp through encased history. |
B |
Observe & Report – it’s dark as hell, but this Seth Rogen-starring saga about a mentally unstable security guard comes off as a comedic remake of Taxi Driver.
The twisted psychology is spot on, and Rogen does a fantastic job at making this inherently unlikeable miscreant someone to reflexively root for. |
A- |
Paranormal Activity – the next Blair Witch Project, this overly hyped pseudo-documentary succeeded through decent acting and realistic character dynamics. The only problem with bare-bones productions such as this is that for it to succeed the viewer needs to bring their own fears to the table.
It’s not a passive experience by any means, and thus will fail to entertain some while scaring the bejeesus out of others. The only bummer is the tacked-on, Spielberg-influenced finale, which steps away from the film’s subtlety to embrace typical Hollywood horror tropes. |
B |
Planet 51 – a largely forgettable animated tale of a human astronaut (Dwayne Johnson) stuck on an alien planet that views him as the frightening outsider.
There’s a cute WALL-E knockoff and some fun nods to classic films, and while the animation is simpler than one would expect it’s innocuous enough for kid’s product. |
B- |
Ponyo – Hayao Miyazaki’s fable about a fish-turned-girl features beautifully penciled backgrounds and an unlikely love story that’s just bizarre enough to become completely captivating.
Kids will love it just because their still-settling brains won’t comprehend how weird it is, and adult acid casualties and anime buffs will appreciate it for other reasons. |
A- |
Public Enemies – Michael Mann’s slow-burn character study of John Dillinger and his true love is a real grower that continues evolving with further viewings.
The decision to film a period piece as if hi-def digital cameras existed in the 30s makes for an engrossing (if occasionally off-putting) slab of gutsy cinema. |
A- |
Push – this could easily have been (and possibly should have been) a television show, as the sprawling pseudo-anime story about dueling mutants with powerful brains was muddled by the film’s compressed running time.
Chris Evans and Djimon Hounsou have a blast chewing up the scenery, though the questionably adult attire donned by Dakota Fanning may leave some disturbed. |
C+ |
Race to Witch Mountain |
C |
Red Cliff |
A- |
Surrogates |
B- |
Taken |
B |
The Blind Side |
B+ |
The Great Buck Howard |
B |
The Hangover |
B |
The Haunting In Connecticut |
F |
The Hurt Locker |
A- |
The Informers |
B |
The International |
B |
The Lovely Bones |
A |
The Pink Panther 2 |
B |
The Twilight Saga: New Moon |
B- |
The Unborn |
F |
This Is It |
B+ |
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen |
D+ |
Underworld: Rise of the Lycans |
B |
Up |
A- |
Up In the Air |
B |
Watchmen |
A- |
X-Men Origins: Wolverine |
B+ |
Year One |
C - |
More reviews to come, but in the meantime check out my current film ratings over at the Projections site!